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Help: again


I posted a couple months ago about how I was getting my first tattoo and how controlling my roommates mom is (long story, but she basically took me in when I was at a really bad point in my life and now she’s like a mother figure to me). So I ended up getting that tattoo with my roommate and she was super mad! (mostly at my roommate, but I suffered the back lash. So even before we got those tattoos, I told her constantly (to plant the idea in her head and so she couldn’t say I never told her) that I’d be getting one for my birthday as well. So my birthday was on Friday and I went and got a huge piece without telling her and now I’m hiding it. I don’t know how to tell her:(

Useful 20

i mean, regardless of how you view her and how she views you, she really has no say in what you should be allowed to do with your own body and your own money. even if she was your biological mother, if you were under 18 sure, legally she could prevent you from getting one. but after that you’d be allowed to do whatever you please.
i guess what i’m trying to say is just because she disagrees with it, and that you two have a close mother-daughter type relationship, doesn’t mean she should be allowed to control what you do, or get so mad at you. at the most id agree with her expressing her distaste for tattoos, but for you to be afraid to tell her because she’ll get that mad is not healthy, especially since you mentioned shes very controlling.
it might be worthwhile to try and have a talk with her about how you feel and how you’re going to do whatever you want. she should not be allowed to micromanage your life and she should not take out her anger on you because you go against her “wishes”, either.


I’m in a similar boat, I got a tattoo nearly a year ago now and still haven’t told my parents. I didn’t get the chance to tell them beforehand and it just felt a little weird to tell them after the fact. But, the way I see it, I’m an adult, I paid for it with my money, and it’s on my body. It’s really none of their business and I don’t have to ever tell them if I don’t want to, especially because I doubt they’ll ever see it.
I do plan to telling them eventually (because if I die in an accident where I’m unrecognizable except for an intact tattoo, I want them to be able to tell it’s me), I just might fudge the dates a little so they don’t feel like I’ve been hiding it from them. I plan to tell them I’m getting a tattoo right before I get touch ups on it, so they’ll have some warning and then I’ll just pretend it’s new then.