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some (special?) friend troubles TM - kind of just a vent post

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idk if i’m seeking advice really or just want to vent? there’s not anything i really want advice on, but this is what i’ve been dealing with recently. i just kind of want to let it out without bothering my friends at school or anything.

ok so there’s this guy i’ve been like,,, kind of talking to? he’s been my friend for a little while before that, like above anything else he’s definitely my friend. anyways. i’m a very empathetic person and tend to want to ease the pain and stress of anyone I’m close to. he’s been having a lot of bad stuff happen in his life that he doesn’t share with me, and he keeps pushing me away. especially after we have a lot of fun together or something, the very next day he’ll get formal and almost cautious in the way he texts me. i slept over his apartment tuesday night and we had what i thought was a really nice time just like enjoying each others company, and when i left wednesday morning he seemed to be in such a good mood, and then that night he tells me he wants to “table spending time together for a little bit,” saying that he felt really out of it and needed to get a handle on his emotions.

there’s a lot i’m leaving out obviously, but he’s the kind of person who suffers in silence and tells himself he deserves whatever feelings he’s going through. i’ve told him that’s not healthy, and he does see a counselor at our university on occasion. i also know he’s not one to talk to his friends about his issues. i don’t really know how to get through to him, and i’m really assuming he doesn’t want me to, so i’m not pushing it. i just really hate giving people space when i know they’re in pain, like i’m legitimately bad at that. all i want to do is help, and right now i just feel kind of useless and awful. there’s also the fact that i’m going through emotional whiplash with him here with me one day, not with me the next.

so right now i’m just trying to deal w all that (: and idk how to help him by letting him push me away, but we’re not quite at the point where i can fight him on this. so i’m just kinda accepting it and ignoring the empath crap i’m feeling.

sry this was long, i just needed to try and get a little of the emotions i’m feeling out!! hope ur having a better day than me

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Could it be possible that he likes you more than a friend but is concerned that this may ruin your friendship or he does not know how to handle his feelings?

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It sounds like he has feelings for you, but for some reason he doesn’t want you to know, but when he’s hanging out with you he can’t help but show that he is having a good time, and/or has feelings for you So after that he, in a way, punishes himself for showing that, by not talking to you much. I also think he has some kind of mental health issue and is having trouble handling it. He probably doesn’t trust anyone enough to tell them. of course I don’t know the full story, so I might be -and probably am- wrong.